How a Christian speaks
We have considered the dangers of a loose tongue. But what happens when we use our tongue for good? Biblically, how are we to use our tongue? Let’s pick a few verses that may guide us.
Our tongue is to speak of His Word, for all His commandments are righteousness (Ps 119:172). One of the signs that follow believers is that they will speak with new tongues (Mark 7:35). A wholesome tongue is a tree of life (Prov 15:4), and on the Proverbs 31 woman’s tongue is the law of kindness (verse 26). Proverbs 28:23 says he who rebukes a man will find more favour afterward, than he who flatters with the tongue.
These verses reflect that we can and should use our tongue to guide, to exhort, to encourage, as well as to speak in tongues.
1 Cor 14.4 explains that speaking in tongues is for our edification, that is, for our all-round growth. Additionally, the tongue should correct or rebuke in love, rather than flatter. It’s easier to give lip service, or to say something that is nice but not necessarily true, over speaking truth. Sometimes, it’s even painful to speak the truth when others say otherwise, but the Bible is clear that afterward, honesty will speak. We must trust God’s Word in the difficult situations where we must speak the truth in love.
At times, a curse may be placed upon us; the Bible also provides guidance for such instances. Isaiah 54:17 provides that no weapon formed against you will prosper, and every tongue which rises against you in judgement you shall condemn, and that this is the heritage of the servants of the Lord.
Where we are our own worst enemy, we need to begin by loving ourselves. God loved you so much that He sent His only Son for you (John 3:16). So, since He loves you, you can learn to love yourself. This may mean that we must first forgive ourselves or others for past hurts. Ps 147.3 comforts us that He heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds. Rom 15.7 says we should accept one another, (including ourselves) then, just as Christ accepted you. Meditate on the verses that will encourage you to love yourself, use your tongue to speak them out loud to yourself, and trust God to take care of all your hurts.